a common flaw in my thinking is to fail to be as attuned to nuance and subtle distinctions as I ought. and having recognized this unfortunate tendency, I'm now rendered super sensitive to its cropping up in others' rationale.
one need look no further than banal facebook to witness discourse on soft matters that is so terribly splintered, so strictured as to leave anyone not entrapped in the ramshackle construction to cringe (and unsubscribe). these sorts of exchanges are not just unhelpful. they are damaging. what could be an opportunity to publicly demonstrate productive ways of thinking together, or even of disagreeing, instead becomes a public embarrassment. when both parties are slinging mud--bad reasoning and bad manners--both end up with dirt on their faces.
it's worse in relationships with friends, family, and lovers. conversations that insist on reducing hurt feelings to cut-and-dry situations ("but you did x, so of course I felt like y!") are misguided from the get-go. to insist that our side is the most logical, fair, and accurate way of conceiving of things is erroneous. I think this is because truth generally manages to encompass some parts of both sides' narratives. to grasp that truth requires an open and searching hand; we can't ever hope to find it while tightly clutching our own fractions of its whole.
truth exists, but it can be hard to track down--hard to draw near to (I like what Josh wrote about truth after a conversation with me last December). and while sometimes it lays at the end of well-worn paths, more often than not it takes some sniffing out. the trouble is when, in our thinking, we wander down the path of least resistance and plop into intellectual sinkholes.
I'm as prone to this as anyone when dealing with complex matters. but I do believe that careful consideration is a skill that can be cultivated, so as deficient in it as I presently feel, I am confident that I can mature in this way.
however, I've got a long way to go when it comes to fairly assessing my own potential. this is because my thoughts often disappear into another type of sinkhole. I have difficulty writing about it--my desire to be fair and precise in my expression of things sometimes leaves me sometimes unable to speak of them at all.
it's something like this: I pick up on patterns that emerge after the fact and view them as prescriptive. how silly! but it's common. imagine how many people have avoided giving themselves over to a natural and wholesome interest just because they don't consider themselves to be "that sort." we see that people engaged in a common behavior also dress similarly, or drive similar cars, or have similar backgrounds, and we consider these features to be a prohibitive necessary prerequisite!
the most needed "next thing" for us may be patiently waiting just a short ways down the trail. let us not roll off our path and drop off into faulty furrows.
I have stretched my mind in writing this; it's now quite spent. this is all I have to offer for the evening.
